Emotional: Anger & frustration come to mind first as i experience these emotions most often in relationship quarrels with my spouse. The anger is usually triggered by the feeling of lack of appreciation or becoming defensive about a comment or accusation made about myself.
These bouts can lead to me lashing out at her or entertaining resentful negative mind chatter about some incident in the past or some vengeful action in the future, two very self defeating habits. These lead to me behaving and thinking like an out of control human that self inflicts pain upon his person and loved ones, then blames them for the hurt.
Sensual: Sex.. I get frustrated when i am unable to get the attention desired to satisfy my sensual needs, this is often due to the lack of sexual interest and desire from my spouse due primarily to a hormonal change associated with nursing. The anger and frustration stems from me feeling neglected sexually as i have developed an appetite for pleasure. This appetite can cause me to be resentful and frustrated when not met. This also may have something to do with me prescribing to societies definition of what a spouse should do. ie, satisfy the man sexually so as to keep him from seeking other means arousal.
Food can also fall into the sensual section. We can overindulge in sweets or simply over eat due to the sensual urges of the pallette or specific cravings. This can also lead to frustration or a irritation in many ways, including wasting resource (frustration once we have consumed all the foods for the week) as well as acid indigestion, heart burn etc.. all from overindulgence in sense pleasure.
Solution: be mindful of how your feel when reahing for food. Im i really hungry? Is this plate too big?
Ultimately I am responsible for my own actions and thinking patterns, most of what was mentioned above has very little to do with my spouse but mostly originates from my own HUMAN SELF IMAGE. Ie. Expressing negative emotions because my ANIMAL URGES were not being satisfied when I felt they should. The need to have your feelings and emotions catered too and justified by someone else is actually Sahu behavior and childish.
Solution: To raise above the trivial emotional state by becoming aware of theses urges and CHOOSING to ignore them urges altogether. Even when an urge seems justifyable it is best to refrain from Blaming others for its lack of fullfillment or dwelling on the reasons for it not being fullfilled on my terms. Make a commitment to acting like the God that am within you are no longer the selfish child of years past. Become Ausar, put on your crown and see yourself enjoying your goals instead.
** Note** Focus on conteracting not only the above behaviors but the actions and thinking of the following..
Seeking- Feeling like i need to catch up, or im missing out on something.
Trying too hard to achieve
Forced behavior
Not at peace
No comments:
Post a Comment